Twin Flame Separation: Signs of a Breakup and Finding Reunion

Your Flame journey may be one of the hardest, most gut-wrenching relationships that you will ever have to navigate in this life. This article will outline why you may be experiencing twin flame separation and how to work towards your divine union.

What is Twin Flame Separation?

Twin flame separation is one key stage of the twin flame journey; a catalyst for self-growth. Often, there is more than one separation phase, with one person acting as the ‘runner’ and the other as the ‘chaser.’ After a period of separation, a twin flame couple may reunite. However, often this separation cycle repeats itself many times. 

LEARN MORE: Runner and Chaser Twin Flame, Which One Are You?

The separation phase of a Twin Flame relationship may look like any combination of the following:

  • Emotional Distance:
    one person being emotionally unavailable, or even blocking contact with their twin.
  • Physical Distance:
    one person relocating or moving away from their twin.
  • A Third Person Being Involved:
    it is possible to experience karmic and soulmate relationships, even if you have a twin flame.

Whilst, many people describe the separation phase as an extremely painful process, the separation stage is a positive sign that your soul is ready to let go of old behavior patterns and evolve. We will be discussing the positives to be gained from such an experience further on down the line.

There are many symptoms associated with twin flame separation and signs that suggest that your twin flame may be coming back. We will be taking a look at these signs and symptoms, as well as outlining two key actions that you can take to get your twin flame back.

Finally, many people also ask ‘how do I know if they are my real twin?’ We will be exploring this in more detail, along with the question ‘should I date other people during the separation phase?’

Hands reach for each other during a breakup with a heart behind them.

What happens when two twin flames separate?

When separation occurs, twins may deal with it in very different ways.

Often the chaser will relentlessly pursue their twin and try to get them back, which in turn can leave them feeling depleted and drained. This is because they are looking for love outside of themselves, rather than from the universal source above, below, and within.

On the other hand, the runner will often carry on with their lives as usual and ignore any contact from their twin flame. This does not mean that they are not feeling immense pain inside, however, they may ‘numb’ out to their emotions and it may feel easier to them to act bluntly or cut contact.

During my personal experience, as a chaser, I would repeatedly call, message, and try to contact my twin flame – even if it had been months since we had spoken. Once, I even turned up at his doorstep completely out of the blue and thought ‘Oh hell, what am I doing here?!’

Usually, my ‘chasing’ tendencies would only push him further away, and our relationship would fracture even more. In fact, I remember feeling so hopeless that he wasn’t responding to any of my messages, that I would delete his number in an attempt to take my power back!

Of course, this never worked, as I was only acting from the power of my ego.

Usually, a separation occurs when a couple is ready for their next level of soul expansion.

It is not uncommon for twins to channel the pain and emotion of their separation into something bigger than themselves; a big adventure, a new job, or a creative project.

Ultimately, the pain felt during the separation phase will be transmuted into something higher; a greater understanding of themselves, divine love, and/or the world around them.

Causes of Twin Flame Separation

Many factors can contribute to twin flame separation; every twin flame journey is unique within itself and the path can vary hugely from couple to couple.

Some twin flames may experience multiple stages of separation, some may experience only one, long intense period of being apart, some may never come into complete union, whilst others may reach divine union after twenty years of back and forth!

A couple breaking up and sad.

However, here are seven main causes of twin flame separation:

  1. You Both Need Some New Insight

Your twin flame is your mirror soul and having your shadow side reflected back to you constantly can be an extremely exhausting and triggering process. Sometimes, space is the only thing that can give you both insight. After, realigning to your own energy you may be able to return to the relationship with a whole new level of understanding for you, your partner, and the relationship.

  • Your Souls Need to Experience More Growth

Your soul may need to learn more lessons before you are ready for a sustainable, long-term partnership with your twin flame. This may mean that you both need to experience other relationships, other breakups, and other life lessons before you are ready to be in union with your twin.

  • The Universe Wants You To Experience Divine Love
    Whilst a twin flame union can feel like an all-consuming, overwhelming love bath, there is nothing quite like the love of the divine. If you have been relying heavily on the love that you receive from your twin flame, the Universe may be giving you a wake-up call by initiating another separation phase! Ultimately, everything in the Universe is impermanent, except the divine love which flows through everyone and everything. A phase of separation may be calling you to the realisation of this truth, and with this lesson, you will learn – you are always loved and supported, whether you are with your twin or not.  
  • You Both Need Time to Heal Emotionally
    Emotional triggers and wounds can take months, years, or even decades to heal. Previous unhealthy attachment patterns learnt in early childhood, or even later on in life with family and friends can wreak havoc when meeting your twin flame. Your soul may need time to heal wounds of the past before you are both ready to be emotionally available for your twin flame union.
  • Co-dependency Creeps In
    After the initial honeymoon stage, it is not unusual for co-dependent behaviours to creep in…This usually boils down to a lack of self-love (on one or both parts) and the inability to communicate your needs to one another without fear that the relationship may end.
    If co-dependency begins to creep in, a separation phase may be initiated so that you can both take a look at your self-worth and step back into your personal power.
  • The Timing Isn’t Right
    In the words of the late twentieth century, metaphysical writer Florence Scovel Shinn:

    “it is your will, not my will, it is your way, not my way and it is your timing, not my timing”
    (referring to the universe/the divine)

And so it is with Twin Flames.

It is not your choice to decide whether, how, or when you will come into union with your twin flame. It is up to your soul’s divinely chosen path, and the path of your partners too.

  • You Have Learnt the Final Lesson

Some twin flames are not meant to come into union in this lifetime. It is possible that you have lived and will continue to meet with your twin flame across many lifetimes.

Sometimes, after learning a final lesson, twin flames reunite. However, for others, they may have learned all the lessons that they needed to or were ready to experience in this lifetime.

This may look like a ‘final separation’ or conscious choice to part ways. 

Is this separation stage a ‘bad thing?’

Although the separation stage can feel like an extremely painful process, there are many positive experiences to be yielded from experiencing such circumstances.

Positive aspects include:

  • Having time to work on levels of self-worth and self-love
  • Having space to reflect and heal old, emotional behaviour patterns
  • Having time to channel your pain into your soul mission and/or creative projects
  • Healing your inner child and any wounds they are carrying
  • Increasing levels of resilience, trust and faith
  • Being free to choose where you channel your time and energy
  • Accessing higher levels of divine love and support

However, even whilst in separation, you may still experience signs that confirm that you are still energetically linked to your twin flame. Whilst, they may not appear in your physical reality, it is possible to sense their presence through a variety of signs and symptoms…

Twin Flame Separation Symptoms

Here is a list of signs and symptoms that you may experience when experiencing a separation phase with your twin flame:

  1. Experiencing lots of synchronicities!

In my personal experience, this looked like: people mentioning my twin flame after years of not seeing them, hearing my twin flames name in lots of conversations, seeing my twin flames name on number plates, bumping into my twin flames family, smelling or seeing objects linked to my twin flame.

  • Having vivid dreams about them…

You may have lived more than one life with your twin flame, therefore it is possible to remember and dream about past life experiences with your twin. This may support you to understand and clear karmic bonds between the two of you.

  • Feeling an unbearable sense of longing/loss over your separation

This will not feel like a usual break-up, it will almost feel as if you are grieving the death of a loved one. Friends and family may think that you are ‘over-reacting’ but the sense of loss and longing can feel overwhelming and unbearable.

  • Feeling as if no one else compares

You may have other potentials showing you romantic interest, however, these connections may feel empty and boring compared to the intensity of your twin flame.

  • Undergoing a HUGE amount of internal growth

Each separation phase with your twin flame is a catalyst for the next stage of your emotional and spiritual growth. During these phases you may experience drastic shifts in your emotional and behavioral patterns – you will level up to the next best version of yourself.

So, these are the basic signs and symptoms of a twin flame separation stage, but the big question is – how do you get your twin flame back?

How to Get Your Twin Flame Back

There are two keys to getting your twin flame back.

  1. Focus on Your Own Self-Growth & High Vibe State

This can be extremely difficult when you are in the stages of longing for your twin, however, the rewards for taking some time out to truly focus on you, your goals and your growth can be exponentially rewarding.  

In my personal experience, my twin flame always returned when I was in a high vibe, flow state.

Usually, this would be after months of self-care, feeding my body good food, starting creative projects, getting stuck into wider communities around me, and when I was feeling energized and passionate about life. Every time I was solely focused on ‘getting my twin flame back,’ it would end in an absolute disaster re-union with tears and egos flying everywhere.

  • Surrender and Accept That You Have No Control Over the Situation  

Trust that if you are truly meant to reunite, then it will be. Until that day, take the lessons and blessings learned from your relationship and focus on living your best life – without your twin flame.

When you surrender to the process, you let go of resistance and allow good to flow into your life.

This ‘good’ may be the return of your twin flame, an awesome experience or it may come in the form of someone else. Accept that The Universe is always working FOR YOU and trust that it will deliver what is meant for you.  

Whilst conducting some online research, I asked the question ‘How did you come into union with your twin flame?’ Respondents answered the following:

“For me, it’s still Work in Progress – I’m not exactly the right person to answer this question yet. But as far as experience I have heard – a lot of healing and self-love along with high vibrational frequency helps twins to be in Union on all levels.”

Another responded:

“The inner work? All you do is stay present, mindfulness, and detach from the mind. That’s it! Then it just happens! There is never a discussion of being together. They behave differently. Then you just come together however, there is no expectation or outcome. You focus within!”

But how can you tell if you have done ‘enough’ inner work and how can you sense when your twin may return?

Signs of Reunion After Separation

You may have already experienced signs surrounding your twin flame re-union…

For example, you may share a song with your twin which you begin to hear everywhere, maybe you smell the scent of their perfume or perhaps you keep seeing an object related to your twin.

However, other key signs of a near reunion include:

  • Feeling bright, positive and in your flow state
  • Dreaming about them more frequently
  • Having random thoughts about them pop into your head
  • Your intuitive nudges ‘sense’ that they may be in contact soon
  • Feeling positive, loving feelings and forgiveness towards them
  • You reaching a point where you don’t feel you ‘need’ them in your life anymore

So, now you know the signs of a near reunion, how can you be sure that they are your twin flame?

Is it a Twin Flame – How to Tell?

It seems that the key factor that separates twin flames from other forms of connection is the intensity of the connection. Following on from my research, I asked an online community ‘how can you tell if someone if your twin flame?’ One respondent answered:

“A twin flame bond is not comparable with any other… we meet soulmates and karmics many times throughout our lives but a twin flames’ bond is beyond the intensity of other connections.”

Personally, after a few years on my awakening path, I came across the concept of twin flames and I just knew that this was what the relationship was. This was then confirmed to me unexpectedly by a medium, without me even asking about my twin flame!

Whilst this confirmed my gut feelings about the relationship, it also confused me as I was not in a relationship with my twin at the time…

READ MORE: Can your friend by your twin flame?

Should I date other people during my twin flame separation?

Yes. If you feel drawn to someone else, be open to exploring the relationship.

It is not up to you when your twin flame returns. There are three energies involved: the desire of your soul, the desire of their soul, and the greater plan of the Universe.

All need to be in perfect alignment for you and your twin to be in union.

Therefore, it may be YEARS before your twin or the Universal energies are aligned for your union.

Sometimes, other karmic and soul mate connections may even teach you valuable life lessons which you need to experience in order to be ready for union with your twin flame in the future!

Many people think that their twin flame is the person they are destined to be within this lifetime but this isn’t always the case…

READ MORE: Do twin flames last?

Here is an extract of the Twin Flame Story of Jeanette and Nelson (1941) from the book ‘Soulmates and Twin Flames’ by Elizabeth Clare Prophet

Jeanette and Nelson were wildly in love but hid their secret affair for more than 30 years…

‘Jeanette’s ambition, their occasionally violent tempers, and a strange combination of people and circumstances kept them apart for their entire life’s. So, it seems that things do not always turn out, even when you do find your twin flame. Their life story is a tragedy of twin flames. In includes an implicit warning to us in our quest to find perfect love: if we do not overcome the negatives of our karma, we can never enjoy complete happiness, whether or whether not we find our twin flame.’

As you can see, even though you may have found your twin flame – it doesn’t always mean that you will reach or experience a ‘perfect union.’

Please do not waste your entire life longing for your twin flame, when there are so many beautiful souls and relationships for you to explore!

In Conclusion

The separation stage of a twin flame relationship can be extremely challenging.

There is no set timeline for a period of separation and the ‘chaser/runner’ dynamic may repeat itself many times before a couple comes into divine union. There are many key signs and symptoms which can support you to ‘sense’ the return of your twin flame.

The two actions you can take to heal the relationship and invite them back into your space are:

  • to focus on your own self-growth and high vibe state
  • to surrender and accept the fact that you have no control over the situation.

Remember, if it is meant to be, it will be. Until then, enjoy expanding, growing, loving, learning, and becoming the person you were always meant to be; faithful, trusting, and free. 

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Jadine Lydia
Jadine Lydia
Jadine Lydia is an Intuitive Life Coach L.C.H Dip. Freelance Writer & Inspirational Content Creator. She lives on the Cornish coast in South West England. Her writing shares her happy-go-lucky, holistic approach to love, laughter, and life; inspiring others to deepen their connection to the divine. She empowers others to take 'intuitive action' towards manifesting their deepest dreams and desires through her inspirational content, books and e-courses.