This blog post aims to help you understand what masculine energy is and how to increase it. I will discuss why masculine energy is essential for a man, the sources of male power, things that rob us of our Masculinity, and tips on boosting your Masculinity. If you want more self-confidence and stronger relationships with others, then read on!
What is Masculine Energy?
Connecting to your positive Masculinity can give you confidence and strength in knowing who you are. Masculinity can be viewed as one side of the continuum, feminity being the other.
Where you lie on this continuum is what makes you unique. Don’t think that because you are born a man, you need to be 100% masculine. In actuality, all of us are on some point of that continuum.
Masculinity is also not tied to Biology. It is an energy that you can cultivate no matter your biology or sexual orientation.
If you are interested in diving deeper, check out this in-depth article I wrote on what is Masculinity.
You might be wondering if Masculinity is inherent (you are born with a certain amount) or if it could be developed. I asked my following on Instagram, and 89% of people agreed that Masculinity could be cultivated.
This was a great reflection of what I have learned through my lifetime. I have found that certain practices helped me become more grounded in my masculine energy.
But it wasn’t always that way.
For the longest time, I was trying to understand what Masculinity is through my intellect. I never quite got it… until I stopped thinking and started to feel it.
I began doing meditations, exploring archetypes, and hanging out with more men. There was a more profound presence that I began to feel and associate with my Masculinity.
What this place felt like for me might not be what it feels like to you. But, in working with hundreds of men and women, there are a few key components that I have found that help people connect to their masculine energy.
The following list is by no means exhausted, but these are the main things I have seen work for myself and hundreds of men.
At the end of the article, I will also share thoughts on how long it can take to start feeling a difference in your connection to Masculinity.
1. Surround yourself with Masculinity
Jim Rohn: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
I was talking with a teacher of mine about how I wanted to cultivate more masculine energy. At the time, I had a lot of female friends and was more connected to my feminine.
My teacher turned to me and told me I needed more male friends.
He was right.
In the past few years, I have spent more time cultivating male friendships and finding great support in my development. It’s like the power of osmoses. Being around Masculine people helped me developed those traits in myself.
One of the great tragedies of modern culture is how many men don’t priorities male friendships. What little time they have gone towards the pursuit of women or their romantic relationship.
There is something profound that happens when, as a man, I can hang out with other men. The feeling of brothership helps me feel centered and alive. In a study printed in the Journal of Men’s Study, they found that being in a men’s group increased mental health, happiness, and emotional stability.
If you don’t identify as a man, you can still cultivate relationships that help you connect to Masculinity. The key is to surround yourself with people that extrude Masculinity.
2. Identify your favorite masculine traits
A great way to increase your Masculine energy is to identify what you admire in others and find ways to emulate it.
Try the following writing activity:
- Identify who or what inspires you. Is there someone that motivates to do better than before? If so, find out as much information about this person as possible such as their background and personality traits.
- Write down all the admirable qualities.
- If you don’t have someone in mind, then think about what it means to be masculine and take on this identity for yourself.
- For example: What are the qualities of an honorable man? An admirable male figure? A loving father or son? Perhaps one who’s courageous and confident but humble at the same time.
- Next to your list of qualities, write down what would help you practice those skills. For example, if you admire a calm deminer, perhaps try slowing the mind through meditation.
2. Awakening the Masculine Archetypes
One of the most powerful things I did in my life was to connect to Masculine Archetypes. They helped me gain a deeper relationship with my Psyche.
Archetypes can be great to help you view the different psychological patterns of your identity. Creating a conscious relationship with the various Archetypes can help you embody mature and balanced Masculinity.
Archetypes are a collection of symbols that represent the various roles we can play throughout our life. These archetypes are derived from ancient mythologies and religions. Still, they’re also pretty universal-we all have a divine protector inside us, an eternal child lurking deep beneath the surface, or a wise old sage with many years of experience to share.
Each archetype is specifically designed to help you develop your personality and grow into who you want to be the best possible person.
I like to think of archetypes as focus lenses that allow you to see the different aspects of who you are.
The five Masculine Archetypes:
Warrior: dedication and action
Wizard: Knowledge and wisdom
Father: Nurturing and providing
Lover: Sensual and present
Sovereign: Harmonious and strategic
The five archetypes are from there HeroRise Masculine Archetype System, and used in the Archetype Deck. I have created a free Masculine Archetype Ebook to help you connect to these different aspects of your Psyche.
The eBook also included activities you can use to embody different masculine traits. It’s a great starting point to help you reconnect/deepen your relationship with Masculinity.
Activity and Guidebook
3. SELF TRUST: A MASCULINE FOUNDATION
Going from boy to manhood is about developing self-trust.
The more you learn about yourself and what it means to be confident in your Masculinity, the easier it will become for you to build up this self-trust. And, once achieved, this self-confidence not only helps improve all aspects of life but also attracts people towards you.
Self-trust is about knowing what you’re worth and not feeling the need to be anyone other than yourself.
People can tell if you are trying to appease them or constantly manage what other people will think of you. It’s not only existing, but it makes you untrustable.
Don’t make other people’s choices. Trust your authentic voice – The one that is deep inside you.
If you genuinely know who you are and WHY you do what you do, you will find yourself radiating positive Masculinity.
The more self-trust you have, the greater your potential for success in all areas of life. When exploring your Masculinity, start by asking yourself these questions:
- What is my best quality?
- What are some things that make me unique as an individual?
- What are the greatest gifts I have to give?
- How can I best share my talents?
Answering these questions will help you unravel why you are already a solid and trustworthy person.
4. Let your consciousness expand
Every morning for six months, I woke up and meditated on Masculinity. At first, I would let my mind wander around the attributes and traits I was looking for, but eventually, I saw that it wasn’t helping me.
A significant change happened when I decided to “feel my masculinity.”
Here is the activity:
- Sit in a quiet room.
- Visualize your body and self.
- Extend out your consciousness – As if my personality, ego, or self was extending out and filling every corner of the room.
- Sit in at least 10 minutes with this expanded awareness.
When I do this meditation, I feel dropped into the deep masculine.
I’ve noticed that when I do this same thing in a room of people, it magnetizes people to me, it increases my confidence, and helps me stay present.
If you want to cultivate Masculine energy, try and take the time to practice extending your consciousness to fill the room you are in.
5. Become Self-Reliant
Self-Reliance is an essential trait of Masculinity. Start learning how to do things for yourself. Take responsibility and don’t let others dictate what you are capable of completing on your own.
Practice Self-Reliance through:
- Cooking dinner
- Fixing furniture, electronics, or cars
- Home repairs
Learning to become self-reliant will help you when faced with difficult situations, like being out of a job or having no one else to help you.
What makes self-reliance so powerful is it allows people to trust you more.
Others can tell that you are willing to take the hard steps to get what is needed to be done.
This is illustrated by the poem “The Invitation” by Oriah Mountain Dreamer:
It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.
“The Invitation” by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
Self Reliance is about becoming dependable. It’s about the determination you have to get things done and the willpower to learn the skills to help you succeed.
But self-reliance must be balanced with interdependence. Otherwise, you will become a loner.
6. Becoming Interdependent
There is a paradox here. Masculinity is both Self-Reliant and Interdependent.
Interdependence is about recognizing that you cannot do anything without help.
No one can be completely self-reliant in today’s world. The more we rely on each other, the better off we all are, as it opens up new avenues of opportunity and makes life easier for everyone.
Interdependence is about having a team to work with, including your family, friends, and coworkers. It means taking care of yourself, so you have the energy to share with them–and vice versa!
It’s about learning how to trust and lean on someone but still do it yourself if you have to.
Being self-reliant will give you confidence in yourself, but being interdependent will allow you to grow beyond your selfishness.
7. Allow sensuality to move through you
Out of the hundreds of men I have talked to, the thing I have heard repeatedly is how they feel their sexual energy is stuck.
To be fully in your masculine, you need to allow yourself to drop into sensual pleasure. We talked before about the Masculine Archetype, and this holds the key to the Lover Archetype.
When you can create a safe emotional space, it allows the feminine to open up sensually. There is profound power in being able to hold that conscious presence and invoke the sensual.
Allow sensual energy to moves through you.
It is a circuit.
If it gets stuck anywhere, try to recognize where in your body. What memory or thought comes up and stops the energy from flowing?
Breathwork can help you recognize these subtle and not-so-subtle shifts.
When you allow your sensuality to move through you, it brings deep masculine confidence.
8. Walk with purpose
Connecting to your purpose helps you radiate confidence and Masculinity. Understanding how you fit into the world around you and what it means to be a man can help increase your masculine energy.
If you don’t know your purpose, here are some exercises you can do:
- Explore different interests and see what you feel drawn to.
- Think about what makes you happy or gives you a sense of peace when they happen in your life.
- Determine what values you hold most dear.
- Look at your past experiences to identify patterns that might suggest a direction for your future life. You can do this with examples from work or school, relationships, romantic or otherwise, or family dynamics. Think about how those scenarios make you feel—what were your reactions? What did they teach you?
- Ask yourself questions like “What is my calling?” “Who am I?” “How would I describe myself without using verbs such as ‘am’ and ‘are?'” “Why was I put on this earth?” Write down any thoughts that come.
In the end, you will only find your purpose thru action.
You will fail hundreds of times before you find what inspires you the most. Even then, at some point, you might lose it and need to find a new purpose to drive you.
The important thing is to keep trying and keep experimenting.
How Long does it take to become more masculine?
Increasing Masculinity isn’t something that happens overnight. There is no moment in which you are entirely 100% your highest masculine potential. Instead of looking at it as “when are you done,” try viewing this as an ever-unfolding process.
If you spend six months with archetypes, breathwork, and cultivating male friendships, you might see some shifts in your personality. Those small shifts are a big deal because they begin to add up over time.
Instead of wistfully looking towards a future ideal, celebrate the small changes and practical steps you can undertake.
If you learn to enjoy the practice, you will find yourself slowly opening up to your Masculinity. Before you know it, you will look back and see how much you have grown.
If you want to be more masculine, you can take activities and actions that will help you cultivate your Masculinity.
- Surround yourself with Masculinity
- Identify your favorite masculine Traits
- Awakening the Masculine Archetypes
- Self Trust: A masculine foundation
- Feel the room
- Become Self-Reliant
- Becoming Interdependent
- Walk with purpose
Is there anything you would like to add to the list?
Help the community by adding a comment below.