Lover Archetype

Lover Archetype

KEYWORDS: VULNERABLE, ENTHUSIASTIC, SENSITIVE
CHALLENGES: HEDONISM, ENVY, HUNGER, SELFISHNESS
TO CULTIVATE: DANCE, EAT, SEX, LAUGHTER

SUB-ARCHETYPES: ARTIST, ROMANTIC, COMEDIAN, ADVENTURER
SHADOW ASPECTS: ADDICT (+), LOST DREAMER (-)

The Lover Archetype expresses emotion, feeling, enthusiasm, and passion. He is sensitive to the physical and sensual world.  He takes in the vivid beauty of the world around him. The Lover Archetype seeks freedom and craves the totality of his tactile experience.

The need for intimacy and connection is so fundamental that life has no meaning without it. The Lover Archetype is about embracing relationships and evoking emotions.  The Lover wants to dance in joy, hold the hands of friends while they grieve, and partake in the pleasures of life. 

This drives the Lover to be a connoisseur of life’s pleasures by following his intuition and creative desires. This search for bliss can lead to the shadow aspect of the Addict and Lost Dreamer.  It’s vital for the Lover to not fall into craving greener pastures, and instead be one with what is present. That can help balance out the hunger and selfishness for more. 

The Lover’s desire for the freedom to experience everything life has to give can also lead to him hurting others. The Lover must learn how to communicate with integrity and consider his emotional impact. Otherwise, his self-absorbed pleasure can leave a trail of hurt behind him. 

You connect with the Lover Archetype whenever you enjoy your senses. By feeling the breeze on your skin, the warmth of a lover, and the scent of summer rain.

When attuned to the Lover Archetype, you feel alive with vigor by being connected to your emotions, whether those feelings are joy or pain. This internal and external intimacy fuels your spirituality and creativity. It’s the place the Muses reside.

When working with the Lover Archetype, look to how you receive and give love to the world. Look to your life’s emotional purpose and ask yourself what helps you stay in the present moment. 

Artist

KEYWORDS: OBSERVANT, SELF-CRITICAL, OPEN-MINDED, CREATIVE
CHALLENGES: IRRESPONSIBLE, ALOOF, OBSESSIVE
TO CULTIVATE: DREAM JOURNAL, FREE-WRITING, DRAW

The Artist harnesses his emotions and expressions to create new works of beauty.  He finds inspiration by fully taking in the complex emotions of the world around him.  Then through time and skill translates his experiences into something others can enjoy. 

The Artist explores the depth of his being. He dives into his shadows, desires, hopes, and grief. From that mad abandon, he toils to shape his thoughts into a physical form that others can comprehend.  He has one foot in the imaginal and one in the material. His greatest pleasure is to see these inner visions realized.

Artistry is created through the body in motion. Playing the guitar is a sensual act of the whole body. The lines on a painting involved the Artist’s entire being.  The Artist’s real canvas is his heart and body. The art is but a byproduct. 

When in balance, the Artist is engaged in a conversation through his expressions.  When the Artist is out of balance, he loses himself in his imaginary worlds—leaving him disembodied and disconnected. 

When connecting with the Artist Archetype, look to how you invoke beauty into your life. Look at your passions and expressions. 

Romantic

KEYWORDS: SENSUAL, AFFECTIONATE, SPIRITED
CHALLENGES: DEPRESSION, MELANCHOLY, UNREQUITED, COERCION
TO CULTIVATE: POETRY, DATES, COOKING CLASS

The Romantic gains pleasure by making others feel special. He desires to share intimacy and connection. This inspires him to share acts of kindness and tokens of affection. He uses his imagination to bring excitement to the world.

The Romantic invests his creative energy into making others feel desired. He uses the sensual tools of poetry, gifts, wine, and touch.

The Romantic must be careful not to use his charm for manipulation. A gift given with expectations is no longer a gift. There is also a big difference between romance and coercion. When working with the Romantic Archetype, make sure there is an undercurrent of respect and mutual empowerment in your actions. 

Romantic energy doesn’t just have to be towards a Lover. Writing love letters to your siblings, having a solo cup of tea, or sharing dinner with friends are all ways you can cultivate Romance in your life.

When working with the Romantic Archetype, look to how you can cultivate relationships with integrity.

Comedian

KEYWORDS: JOYFUL, WITTY, INTUITIVE, LIGHT-HEARTED
CHALLENGES: FRIVOLITY, ALOOFNESS, INSENSITIVITY, BOREDOM
TO CULTIVATE: PLAY, TAKE RISKS, LAUGHTER

The Comedian laughs at the paradoxes of the world. He uses humor to bring levity and illuminate hypocrisy. His infectious joy and light-heartedness can bring comfort to those around him.

A good joke takes impeccable timing, tact, and observation. That is why the Comedian has to be heart-open to life. He has to take in all the pain and find the hidden ridiculousness.  This allows him to transform and release the tension of a room with his wit. 

If not careful, the Comedian can fall into the trap of using humor as a shield. His jokes can diffuse intimacy. He must realize that not all tension is terrible. Humor can bring delight to life, but he shouldn’t rely on using jokes to avoid underlying pain. 

Whenever you enjoy the journey for the journey’s sake, you are connecting to the Comedian. The Comedian can remind you to make space for play. Relationships are more likely to last if you can find humor, even when working through hardship. 

Adventurer

KEYWORDS: THRILLING, DARING, RISK-TAKING
CHALLENGES: BOREDOM, AIMLESS WANDERING, COMMITMENT
TO CULTIVATE: SPONTANEITY, TRAVEL, BREAK DAILY PATTERNS

The Adventurer chases the rush from new experiences through travel, movement, and the exotic. He is ambitious, curious, and daring. The Adventurer is a risk-taker and thrill-seeker. 

The Adventurer gains pleasure through self-discovery and self-sufficiency. He trusts in his skills to survive and thrive in unknown situations. His ability to stay in the moment helps him unearth exciting possibilities. His lives in a world filled with color, sensation, and connection. 

The Adventure is driven to find his individuality through unique stories and perspectives. To him, the path less traveled is the only one worth trying. If left unchecked, this desire for more might leave him unsatisfied and self-destructive. His lust for the next adventure and drive for self-sufficiency can make him selfish to other people’s needs, especially romantically. It can cause him to push away the intimacy that can be found from deeper roots in a single place.

When you draw this card, look at how you add thrill and adventure to your life. Ask yourself if you are running away from something or if it’s bringing you a more profound intimacy. 

Addict

(+) SHADOW ASPECT OF THE LOVER
KEYWORDS: CRAVING, HUNGRY, OBSESSION
TO BRING TO BALANCE: THERAPY, SELF-AWARENESS, COMRADERY

The Addict has insatiable cravings.  No matter how often he gets what he wants, he always needs more. This can be a hunger for drugs, sex, entertainment, shopping, or gaming. The urge can devour all other aspects of his life.

The Addict sacrifices his power for temporary pleasure. This sacrifice can be a constant cycle of needing more to fulfill an ever-growing hole. 

To break free, the Addict must be fully aware of what and why he’s addicted. He must rediscover other joys in his life and use them as a beacon to draw them away from his shadow.   Above all else, he must learn to love himself no matter what happens. He must remind himself to take it one step at a time and have compassion for his process.

When working with the Addict Archetype, look towards your addictions and coping mechanisms. If you are blind to them, you can fall prey to unconscious patterns. 

Lost Dreamer

(-) SHADOW ASPECT OF THE LOVER
KEYWORDS: WITHDRAWN, DAYDREAMING, DISCONNECTED
TO BRING TO BALANCE: SHARE FEELINGS, GROUP SPORTS, SOCIALIZE

The Lost Dreamer withdraws from reality into his fantasies. Instead of enjoying the sunset, he daydreams of being somewhere else, missing out on the beauty in front of him. He finds his imagination safer and distances himself from others. It’s easier for him to want a connection then to take the risk of reaching out. Each time he isolates himself, it becomes harder and harder to break free of the delusions. 

The Lost Dreamer has to open himself up to take risks. It might cause significant pain, but eventually, it will free him from depression and give back his aliveness. 

The Lost Dreamer archetype might show up in your life as a lack of passion or constant daydreaming. Your life might feel like it is something happening to you, not something you are participating with. To break out of this, look at how you can turn elusive dreams into actions that bring you deeper connections to those around you. 

To bring the Lost Dreamer to balance, stop thinking about the thousands of theoretical possibilities. Instead, become more present to your current experience. Deal with the difficulties as they appear, and enjoy the opportunities around you.  

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