Liking Tomboy Girls: Exploring Men’s Attraction
Sexual attraction is a wildly unique thing. I’ve spoken for countless hours with relationship coaches, read hundreds of scientific papers on attraction, and asked my community. I constantly find that everyone has their unique taste.
In this article, we will explore one facet of attraction: how, why, and when a man is attracted to a tomboy woman.
Do guys like tomboy girls?
Many men that identify as straight are attracted to tomboy women. A poll with 220 participants found that 53% of men were attracted to tomboy women at some point in their lives.
For one reason or another, women might find themselves expressing outward Masculinity (this is what many call a tomboy), like dressing in slacks and tee shirts, enjoying rougher hobbies, and doing activities that society considers Masculine. This is entirely natural and can be one aspect of a women’s identity.
On the other side, men can find themselves attracted to women that identify as tomboy. It is just as natural and common as there are tomboys in the world.
REASONS A MAN MIGHT BE ATTRACTED TO A TOMBOY WOMAN:
There are many reasons why men like a woman with a strong masculine personality. Here are nine reasons why men might enjoy dating a Tomboy:
- He enjoys an independent woman with shared interests
- He finds muscular and fit women attractive
- He likes a partner that can get dirty with him
- He’s attracted to the adventurous side of a Tomboy woman
- Spending less time on makeup and getting dress is attractive to him
- He might have a strong feminine side and appreciated the Masculine in a partner
- He likes the down-to-earth nature of a tomboy
There are many reasons why a man might be attracted to a woman that has strong masculine traits. Attraction is a personal and unique thing for everyone. Each of us should celebrate our unique attractions and not shame or label them as good or bad.
Can men be straight and still attracted to a Tomboy?
A man can be attracted to a Masculine Women (tomboy) and still be straight. The term straight references if a man is attracted to the female body. Since a tomboy is a woman, then he can be in a relationship and considered straight.
If a man fantasizes about women and the female body and does not fantasize about men, they are probably straight. The women he fantasizes about can be any shape, size, or personality. What defines him as “straight” is the attraction to the female body.
I have found myself attracted to many women throughout my life. Some have been petite and highly feminine. While others have had a rougher and more masculine appeal. Each of my attractions has been based on a wide range of factors.
It’s ok to be attracted to a range of physical forms and personalities. That is what makes you unique and should be celebrated. Try to allow yourself to be attracted to anyone your mind/body is drawn to.
Tomboys in Relationship: Boyfriends or Girlfriends?
A woman that identifies as a tomboy or deeply connected to their Masculinity can find themselves in relationships with men or women. How they express their personality and hobbies is different from their sexual preferences. A tomboy woman can have boyfriends as easily as girlfriends.
Just because a woman likes masculine hobbies and clothes, it does not mean they are a lesbian. All of us have a unique blend of masculine and feminine characteristics separate from what type of body/sexual relationship you might like to have.
Something that helps me visualize this is the Genderbread Person. It helps break down the difference between Gender Expression, Gender Identity, and Anatomical Sex (or biology).
This range of expression is open to both Men and Women. The key to remember is that your gender expression is different from your Sexual/romantic preference. For example, a woman can show strong masculine behaviors but is still attracted to a man.
Or, she might find herself attracted to women.
The point is being a tomboy does not define someone’s sexual orientation.
Read this article for more on how and why women can express Masculinity.
What kind of guys do tomboys like?
As a whole, there is no one type of guy that likes a tomboy woman —they can be strong and athletic, fit the traditional Masculine, or the man can be more feminine and soft. Men of any personality, body time, upbringing, or sexual preference can be attracted to a tomboy.
Lots of people are attracted to lots of different types of people.
When I conducted the poll about men being attracted to masculine women, I reached out to many participants to discuss it. I found a huge range of men with a vast range of stories/attractions. There was no statistical normal for who they liked, why, and what type of man they were.
I did recognize that if a man is comfortable with themselves and their sexual attractions, they have a more comprehensive understanding of who they are attracted to. This confidence allows them to connect to a broader range of “types” and be comfortable exploring their sensuality.
In Conclusion: Range of Sexual Attraction
Writing this article reminded me about the range of music people love.
In my 20’s and 30’s, I was a full-time musician. I was constantly asking people what music they loved and was particularly interested in what they found to be “sexy music.” One day I asked the question on Facebook and got hundreds of responses.
I spent a whole week going through everyone’s answers on what music they found sexy.
There was everything from techno music, singer-songwriter, and strange ambient music (Autechre).
I was baffled.
There was no similarity in music whatsoever.
The music I thought was sexy was not a standard by any means. Instead, it made me realize that people have such wide tastes in what they are attracted to.
Who we like and why we like them are just as diverse as the music out in the world.
And just as we might like hip hop one day and electronic music the next, our tastes change.
Attraction is such a personal and unique thing. Many men find themselves attracted to Masculine-presenting women (tomboys). As we have seen in this article, over 53% of men have been are attracted to a tomboy woman.
What is important is to be yourself. This range of tastes allows anyone to be who they are, and someone else is bound to be attracted to them.
If you would like to explore this subject more, check out my article on Female Masculinity and an article on Masculine and Feminine polarity.
